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My siblings didn't succeed as much as I did in school and I was cuter a girl and more obedient than my older brothers. My little sister was totally unwanted. I tried so hard not to make my children in to trophies, but probably hurt them by setting "the bar" quite low for them as far as what I expected them to accomplish in life.

I wanted them to feel loved more than anything. The DO love me however. I don't think either of my parents knew what love was and we, their children, struggle to understand what love is. I just wanted to add that another symptom of the nation of narcissist parents is the freak-show of "parents of the autism epidemic" who went totally ballistic when they discovered that they had children who were disabled and wouldn't be attending Harvard or become the next media-prostituted Hollywood Lolita.

They gathered together and tried to pull down the whole nation's public health-care system by destroying confidence in the vaccine program. They were like paranoid psychotics accusing the "evil" government of stealing their children's brains via vaccines. When really it was just about these thoroughly "entitled" parents' egos.

The Strength of the Scapegoat in the Narcissist Family

These same parents hideously tormented their children with outlandish "cures" in an effort to make them, not only normal, but into the "super children" these parents were "entitled" to have, and killed and maimed some children in the process. Just in case this is helpful. Do you know if you are being controlled by a Narcissist? This is the first time I have read about parents discussing their abuse with their children and how it creates the narcissistic tornado.

My mother and father both described horrible abuse to me.

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They had no empathy for me at all. I developed a "fat, tough, funny" persona so they would not abuse me for being "selfish". I spent hours thinking about their issues and problems. I found your piece to have a slightly anti-republican bent. Consider the points made about Democrats and narcissism in the linked article below. Do not think that this subject can be either Democrat or Republican, it is about Human Nature and how we are as a person, an individual.

We are not born Democrat or Republican now are we? You lost me at your analogy: Genetics, chromosomal differences, brain-functioning abnormalities were not addressed in this article; yet we know that they are a major contributing factor. Not at all just an "American" problem and certainly not a recent problem.

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Abuse and use of children as slaves to their parents has been going on since the beginning of time. One woman from another culture country who had married an American man, was asked if she would have more children they had one child and her reply was that she would have another one when the first one was old enough to care for the next one; so NOT an American thing.

The difference may be that we in this current generation and in America, pretend that we care. We pretend that we are trying to raise children who can love, empathize, care about each other, the environment, and future generations, but we deny each other the right to say that the emperor has no clothes. That some people are born incapable of caring about others except in ways that benefit only themselves.

So this is not really caring, but manipulation. This too is not a new problem except that in the past such people would be ostracized or confronted unless they were able to manipulate their way to the top and control many, and in order to do this they usually needed the help of others with their same power-hungry, selfish agendas.

  • The Narcissistic Family: Cast of Characters and Glossary of Terms.
  • Narcissistic leadership.
  • The Strength of the Scapegoat in the Narcissist Family | HuffPost.
  • And let's face it, when people who are born without a conscience are placed in positions of authority over another by becoming a parent, what do you expect them to do? Narcissists think they are God, they really believe that they are never in the wrong, they get butt-hurt when confronted with truth or reality, and they are often thwarted tyrants in their place of employment so who can they lash out at continuously?

    Chatting with an Expert on Narcissism

    Their children who are imprisoned with them. Until we start allowing people to KNOW about the hard-wired brain functioning of certain personality disorders, we will continue down this same road. We are a generation who is much more healthy than previous generations and as a result, more children are surviving or avoiding childhood illnesses that in the past kept the population from growing so rapidly and steadily. We are also blessed to have more conveniences that allow us more free time to enjoy ourselves and the world around us.

    But this is really just on the surface. And the worst part of this is when they do seek help from professionals, it is rare that they are ever told the truth about what their parents are and that a person who has no conscience always uses harmful manipulative tactics as ways of engaging or relating to those around them.

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    That those without a conscience never have healthy relationships as they are incapable of doing this on any level. So if we are all so concerned and forward-thinking as we pretend we are, what's the harm in addressing the truth? What's the harm in letting everyone know that we are not all the same and that some people must harm others, manipulate and control and play power games, as it is their nature?

    And what's the harm in letting everyone make life choices based on truth rather than the fluff of the past? The fluffy, lies like "love will conquer all" or that with more structure and consistency or other BS we tell parents of no-conscience children will help them? Are we really trying to help our children and future generations or are we full of shit?

    The website "Decision Making Confidence" has some great articles on narcissists and their effect on others such as the techniques they use and the damage they do. But this IS a generation that says that we should be happy and fulfilled and should be able to overcome any obstacle that's put before us, and when this doesn't turn out to be true, we are told to seek help.

    Beyond Tyranny & Narcissism: Jesus Incarnates Leadership; Why do we fail to follow

    Well, the first step in getting help is speaking the truth. So let's do that. Thank you for such a thoughtful response and for giving very helpful material and links on this subject.

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    I agree with you, this is not just an "American" problem and I wish to share my train of thought. America is the richest, most powerful country in the world. English has become the most dominant language worldwide and our bluejeans and McDonalds are everywhere. Our nation is a politically and economically dominant force. Is there a downside to this? There is collectively, I think, often a sense that we are the center of the world.

    For example, George W. Bush's decision to act unilaterally waging a war in Iraq, the extent to which we pollute the earth to gain money from oil.

    Narcissistic leadership - Wikipedia

    I also perceive a neglect for our future generations: In my mind, this points to another level of narcissism that some have described as "American Exceptionalism. Could some of the characteristics of American identity contribute to the problems of narcissism in this country on an individual level? Wonderfully written, thoughtful addition. You end with a question that is likely rhetorical, but chicken and egg comes to mind. I must strongly disagree with the notion that the states or any form of government can be or should be intrinsically involved in raising and caring for children.

    Public schools are continually academically failing and harming our kids by brainwashing and one-sided misinformation Germany tried to take control of babies and look how well that worked out. Let's make loving families priority again Life is not a sitcom Dealing with the emotional repercussions of separation.

    Back Find a Therapist. What Causes Stress Eating? Parenting Adolescents and the Choice-Consequence Connection. Has Gender Always Been Binary? Follow me on Twitter. Finally, eighteen illustrations, flow charts, and other diagrams help communicate their concepts.

    Michael McKibben has served in various Christian leadership roles and has written other practical guides for Christian leaders. This book is thoroughly researched and well organized in presentation. However, it is not an easy book to read. Readers can expect to be challenged as the authors present both details of theology and the complex mechanics required to enact and embody effective leadership. The nexus between theology and leadership is truly well drawn, so the reader who applies the effort will not be disappointed.

    For those who genuinely want to change their style and believe that Christ is the model, this book provides the chance to reap significant leadership transformation. Chris Hayden been working at City Book Review since , so that makes him the keeper of knowledge. He manages the office and book reviewers all of them! Without him, this place would fall apart, because no one else in the office knows how to use the postage machine.

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